Sunday, July 17, 2011

It's contagious

Dear Boss,
Please excuse Jodie from day-job attendance for at least the next school term. She is suffering a bubonic type illness, generally known as "cannotus-be-stuffedus", coupled with a distinct inability to arise from slumber at a time conducive to attendance. She is exhibiting a not uncommon but somewhat unhealthy attachment to flannel pyjamas and chenille dressing gowns that will in time, require a full intervention before she can resume her regular work schedule.
She also appears to be experiencing increasing dread at the ten concert preparation weeks ahead and I am led to believe may have, already, thrown one winged-costume induced tantrum. This, along with the patients slight obsession to move no further than 10 metres from her sewing room, leads me to believe that forced attendance would be detrimental to her fragile state.
Jodie has recently exhibited subtle signs of dissatisfaction with certain elements of her day job, most obviously the issue of actually having to go there and I feel she may need to be given some time to work through these issues.
I recommend Jodie be allowed to work completely from home, puddling and noodling at whatever takes her fancy with absolutely no restrictions, deadlines or meetings. I strongly believe this to be the only treatment conducive to a cure.

Sincerely Check Spelling
Jodie
Important medical type professional a white coat.

37 comments:

  1. Every day is one day closer to the summer break...

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  2. Ha ha! And you promised to be on your best behaviour, Jod - oh sorry, that was just for yesterday! Want me to come around with the 'CANCELLED' stamp and make it official? Good luck for tomorrow - I am absolutely dreading Wednesday...

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  3. Works for me. Of course, I don't pay your bills.

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  4. Management highly recommends Jodie gives up all creature comforts, including the buying of threads and material and move ton accolyte home somewhere remote from the Bank Manager. Then management will release Jody from all further fullfilments of her contracts.
    Yours Truly etc. etc....

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  5. I've got what you've got!

    Can I use your letter and just insert my own name?

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  6. Must be contagious. Even though I do work from home, I know what is in store for tomorrow and the deadlines are there.. and the kids still home on holidays.

    Great to see you yesterday too!

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  7. Lottery tickets - the non-dud ones - are the only permanent cure for that. :(

    You should be allowed to stay home, considering what you'd likely create - would be a service to humanity.

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  8. Wonderful.. definitely there seems to be an epidemic....
    Best name of a sickness I have ever heard..... thanks for the giggle
    Hugz

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  9. It's highly contagious and has even hit the northern hemisphere. I'm just clinging to the fact that there are only seven more work days until we break up for the 'summer'....if you can call this chilly, cloudy, drizzly stuff a summer!
    I honestly can't see how your boss could refuse your medical professional's request for you to work from home - after all it is on Doctor's orders :o)

    xxx

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  10. I'm pretty sure there is a doctor out there who would put you on work cover if you argued that case.

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  11. I always knew you were ill!!!

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  12. Surely Gluteus Maximus Impossibilis, or Cannot be Arsed is the proper diagnosis?

    The condition "cannotus-be-stuffedus" is less serious. The compulsion to flannel and chenille however definitely needs surgery. Silk pyjamas and a fine wool dressing gown is to be preferred.

    The patient will also require pictures of the bank manager in several compromising positions in order to fully be able to function as a professional puddler and noodler.

    Dr Griffin the Most Helpful...mostly.

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  13. oooohhhh now I know what I've been suffering from...Think Shay & I should start a South Australian chapter of the "C.B.S' support group ...where getting together to sew in your PJ's is encouraged along with the consumption of copious amounts of "non-healthy" food...

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  14. Come on then, did you give this disease to me or did I give it to you??? Wonder if my work will accept such a sick note...

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  15. God I wish I'd written this instead of you!

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  16. Hi Jodie,

    you've summed up my ailment exactly!!! I'm sure the crappy weather is not helping, but you have made me laugh out loud, thanks!

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  17. if only that would work...

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  18. Very amusing!

    I wish you all the best in what is recognised by many educators to be the most trying of the four school terms.

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  19. Bummer. Would you write notes for all of us?

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  20. Did you come into contact with anyone flying to the States. Because I have come down with the American variation which means that I am hermetically sealed into sweatpants... I wish you a slow recovery. Claire

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  21. The codicil that needs to be added to this is FULL PAY while staying home!

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  22. Hmmm... me suspects the old boss might read this and come up with a cure for the 'cannotus-be-stuffedus' in the form of a big kick-up-the-assedus that will have you out of the flannies and back in the school room quick smart.
    But I give you an A+ for trying it on. Good luck this morning.
    Hugs ~ Kerryanne

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  23. I am sure they have no understanding of how long it takes to create stuff, Jodie, I agree, if i was your doctor i would give you a certificate right away, Unfortunately i am not a doctor Good luck!

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  24. HHmmm I think this is taking on plague proportions, obviously spread world wide via the internet! Jodie, the only cure is to eat chocolate and lots of it!!!
    Hugs
    Jo

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  25. Oh no! I have it too. I just keep thinking of it as a way to fund my crafting.

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  26. I cold sign a Stat Dec for you...

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  27. Can I please get a referal to your 'Important medical type professional a white coat'. I NEED one of those letters.

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  28. Dear Jodie

    On receipt of a letter from a very important medical type professional white coat, I write to inform that you have been granted two months leave from day job, with effect from today. Although the staff, students and I are concerned for your well-being we appreciate the healing effects of chenille and flanalette and urge you to frequent your sewing room as much as possible. We look forward to seeing you back at day job when school concert is over and the next half term break is shortly to begin...

    If only!!!!!!! Ha ha! Have a nice time at work Jod! Hugs!!! Vikki xoxoox

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  29. Oh Jodie..I think you have the even more common complaint of 'I'm Such a Terrific Worker That They Give Me More Than I Can Handle...And I Say Yes Far More Than I Should"...now just reading the title of that complaint would tire you out..let alone doing anything about it! Definitely move ahead with getting sponsors to keep you in chenille and flannel.

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  30. I came down with that yesterday.... can your important medical type professional in a white coat write me one of those notes too?

    Funny how the symptoms first appeared late last night as the school holidays were nearing their end and I realised I really had to go back to work 'proper' today.

    Linda. xox

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  31. Just adding that I'm in charge of our school concert... but we only do it biannually, and our next one is due in 2012.

    Perhaps this insidious disease actually started after my first school concert quite a few years ago and has been building to a rather ugly climax.... maybe I'll be completely ruined by it before planning for next year's concert begins.

    The only cure will be complete abstinence from all concert type activities and anxiety inducing acts involving children under 13.

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  32. Hope the day job accept that professional medical sick note Jod! Locket xx

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  33. Well I do hope you suck it up because I know 2 very cute little girls who are looking forward to you teaching them ;) and did I say ekkkkk!! See you very soon xox

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  34. I feel your pain. I have seen other patients(me) fall deathly ill with the same contagious disease. Unfortunately, I can not reveal names(me) due to HIPPA compliance laws in the U.S.A.

    Until there is a cure, ladies, we should ALL stay in our pjs locked away in our sewing room as a way to show support. ;0

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Hellloooooo !!!!