I was hoping to do a little catch-up post today and tell you of some great things happening in blogland.
This week (and it is only Wednesday) seems to be going to hell-in-a-hand basket. Don't worry there have been no monumental dramas , just the feeling that anything that can go wrong probably will ....and tempers are a little frayed.
Everyone I have to deal with is crabby, or incompetent or both! Things are breaking , stuff is getting lost, appointments are forgotten.
but there is light at the end of every tunnel? yes? Today I found out my blog has a new fan.
HI JOHN !!!!!
Now the thing is John, you have probably caught me at a bad time , you know how it is, I'm a little under the pump, too much to do and not enough time to do it in. Normally I'd be a little more welcoming and I'd also respond to every comment if you had enabled that function.
We could chat, get to know each other (in a purely crafting sense) but again, and I know it sounds like I am making excuses....its just that I have so much to do.......time on the blog is shrinking as the other life crap takes over.....
So please forgive me for not baking a cake or waving flags, but I'd really really like to welcome you and let you know that if you leave me one more comment about Viagra.......
I will hunt you down and I will do things to your willy that no amount of Viagra will fix !!!!
Love Jodie
x x x
TOTALLY CRACKED me up!
ReplyDeleteWell said!
Dear Jodie,
ReplyDeleteI think I love you :P
Hilarious!
Lorena Bobbit, eat your heart out!
ReplyDeleteAmen sister. Totally funny.
ReplyDeleteyour post really brightened a long day! Hope he gets the message
ReplyDeleteMichelle
I hope you do really find John...I want to see the fireworks!
ReplyDeleteYou're a cracker! Thanks for the giggle.
ReplyDeleteouch. Poor John. I hope for his sake he stops offering you that viagra. The Good Time Girl used to visit me a lot, but she hasn't been for ages. I really miss her offering me a good time. If she visits you, say hi!
ReplyDeleteI'd keep my distance if I were John!!LOL
ReplyDelete(perhaps you may need to set your comments to moderated if John returns)
gosh I hope you dont attack him with that grater doodad!!! but perhaps, maybe could be a good idea???
ReplyDeleteLissa
who is a very itinerant blogger!
haha! The threat of damage with nasty looking ikea products is enough to make any man cringe! Good luck with the hunt ;)
ReplyDeletelol, after reading the comments here, perhaps John and The goodtime girl should get together, they sound like they have similar interests...
ReplyDeleteOh how hysterical! (not the cr***y comments but your revenge!)
ReplyDeleteLocket xxxx
ROFL! Jodie, I'm a new visitor, and now I'm staying. My week has been a lot like yours from the sound of it, though John has not made an appearance here as of yet. Laughs have been few and far between, but your post will go a long way toward brightening my day, and probably the rest of the week, since I may crack up at the oddest moments when I think about it later.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the sorely needed laughter this morning!
Haha. That is too funny and entirely appropriate!
ReplyDeletenow you would think that any reasonable human being would steer well clear of anooying a crafter.. after all we know how to wield scisors, needles, pliers... and our tempers can be very short if we have a bad day... as seeing as the majority of us are women...and we tend to band together when there is need... lets just say John might end up alot worse for wear than any amount of pills can fix. *wink*
ReplyDeleteI haven't got much blog spam for awhile but I did get some tracktor/digger based spam which was really wierd.
WoW! I LOVE IT!!! Way 2 tell him! If he doesn't get it from this post then I would venture to think he needs a whole lot more then Viagra! LoL! I wouldn't want to run into you girl in the middle of a dark alley on a bad night! LoL!
ReplyDelete~Tam (boy am I laughing at that one!)
Poor John - he's obviously feeling very inadequate that he needs Viagra to do the business.
ReplyDeletePerhaps he'd like you to make him a sort of 'willy warmer' out of selvedges?
x
Hilarious!!! I haven't seen John about, lucky you!
ReplyDeleteJust a word of advice to John...
ReplyDeleteDude once you have caughed your balls out of your mouth, for the love of God, just quietly pick them up put them in your pocket and run!Do not walk away!RUN! LoL!
(Sorry I just couldn't resist!)
You go girl!!, Love it, an honest australian @#$% off remark!!
ReplyDeleteI hear you about the time thing, Harvest has me more than frayed, I am considering giving up craft to become an alcoholic!! any thoughts..
After staying up until 5am with a vomiting 4 year old this was just what I needed! :D
ReplyDeleteOh Jodie, that's the biggest laugh I've had in days!
ReplyDeleteFunny, I am sorry I missed his comment! But I love yours!
ReplyDeleteLove it....vbg. Never mind the damage the grater would do - I reckon the apple slicer could do enough damage that a whole warehouse full of viagra would be useless.
ReplyDeleteThanks for making my day.
Hope he stays away!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the laugh :) I hope he knows that it is possible to track him down!
eeeep!
ReplyDeleteThe grater! The grater! ouch!
Can you do the same thing to my obnoxious Anonymous commenter? He's a real pain in the ass.....
please?
Leah xxx
Ahh, the 'dear John' letter.
ReplyDeleteGuaranteed to grate , er, I mean, break anymans heart!
Go get him sister!
Ay-men!!! I would hold him down while you grated him too.
ReplyDeleteHey! John came by my blog, too, last night. Tell me when you find him and how to eradicate him!
ReplyDeleteMy first blog read of the morning. Too funny. I think John will stay away with threats to his willy!
ReplyDeleteDear John found me today too!!! CAn I help...I can hold him down for you if you like!!!CAthy
ReplyDeleteGreat start to my morning!! Laughed right out loud!!
ReplyDeleteI was wondering about who this John could be... than I saw the "viagra" relation.... is it possible you are talking about a John Smith?????? If you find him, tell him to leave me the heck alone... I am not interested in Viagra or any other stimulants... I am allready in troubles.... I am 6,5 months pregnand!
ReplyDeleteYou gave me a huge smile on my face, thanks for that!
hugs from the Netherlands
Winda aka DutchQuilter
Well now he's been warned . LOL !
ReplyDeleteClare's Craftroom
Way to go Jodie!! Be afraid John...be very afraid. LOL thanks for the laugh as usual.
ReplyDeleteNice! I love the grater pic. Thanks for the laugh
ReplyDeleteyou. CRACK. me. up!
ReplyDeleteoh, i am laughing! and what a great start to my day!
i will show this to my husband later today and he will laugh, too!
Jodie, I'm not sure those implements are a good idea, especially that apple cutter. You know that would just lead to 9x the original problem!
ReplyDeleteOh my! I'm dying from laughter over here. LOL
ReplyDeleteSo sorry you're having a bad week, though.
And honestly, I didn't see anything wonky about your parasol...I think its fantastic!
Kimberly :)
ROFLMAO! I must have been in work too long today, because I really didn't see that coming. It made me LOL though :0
ReplyDeletexMx
thanks for brightening my day...hahahahahahahahahahahahaha lolololololo
ReplyDeleteHow do I tell you this? John is two-timing you. He visited me this morning.
ReplyDeleteSheesh.
hahaha.
ReplyDeletejodie you have made my morning.
:D
john...note to self: hell hath no fury like a woman with a knife!!!
Sounds like my life... Great!
ReplyDeleteYou are SOOOOO funny!!! Thanks for the laugh!
ReplyDeleteLOL LOL LOL!
ReplyDeleteHilarious!
Is it the same John that keeps asking me to be the recipient of $10000000000000000000?
It could well be!
I've been following your blog for a while now and not commented.. but I just had to say that this post really made me smile and brightened up an otherwise crappy day.. John if your there I'd listen, I don't like the look of that grater Ouch!
ReplyDeleteJohn and his willy must be making the rounds as he left me a little message too...Leave me a little bit to whack off too, I don't want to miss the fun! Hugs, Linda
ReplyDeletehahaha! Very funny stuff! Great post :)
ReplyDeleteJodie I thought I would laugh until I cried - almost did! John is stalking me too. THe funniest part was your choice of things you could use to hurt John and his little pecker! I'm sure it must be small! Lets get him.
ReplyDeleteYou are so funny! I am a new fan to your blog....i promise not to try to sell you anything! Your work is amazing! Love it!
ReplyDeleteHee hee! Personally though, I think he'd be better off with a whack over the head with your new brolly!!!
ReplyDeleteWhat a great blog- I couldn't stop laughing!
ReplyDeleteWhat a great post! John dropped by my blog last night too -- and I'd love to help you eradicate him!
ReplyDeleteBlood on the sewing room floor.
ReplyDeleteBlog land has more drama than TV.
Just laughing at the 'Silent Witness' description of the attacker, blood stained selvedge and ric rak all over the crime scene.
Cheers Jan (no blog)
Aww, that cheesegrater isn't rusty enough! But I love how you pose it ever so menacingly :)
ReplyDeletesooo loved your post!
ReplyDeleteOh, Jodie, you are hilarious. I'm sorry about the bad week. I trust you have read, "Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day" by Judith Viorst. In that fine piece of literature we learn that those days sometimes happen. . . even in Australia. If you've never seen it, let me know and I will send you your very own copy!
ReplyDeletePriceless!! :D
ReplyDeleteI'm sure John just wants to spread the Viagra love ..... *wink wink* !!
this had me cacking myself and also the comment by the other Linda "leave me a bit to whack off too" how ambiguous is that??? very funny too even though she didn't mean it to be!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeletemaybe we could introduce john to the good time girl and we'd all be left alone!
ReplyDeleteJodie, you are a hoot! Thanks for the comedic relief.
ReplyDeleteApparently John has been very busy and has a one track mind. Add in my blog to the list he's made an appearance at.
Too funny... You really hit the spot.
ReplyDeleteBwahahahahaha!!!! Run John run!
ReplyDeleteCan you see John run? Can you see Jodie and her trusty cheese grater too? Are you sitting comfortably? No, John, not you and it's your own fault. John. Don't do that.
You've made my day! That wasnt where I was expecting this post to go :-)
ReplyDeleteMade my day. LOLOLOL
ReplyDeleteLaughing, laughing, laughing. Just what I needed late on a Friday night!
ReplyDeletei got that comment too!! took me forever to learn how to delete it. so now i moderate my comments. no more viagra for me!!
ReplyDelete... AND THE GRATER IS JUST TO START WITH
ReplyDeleteOh you crack me up every time!This is awesome!xoxo
ReplyDeleteOh, thank you I needed a good laugh!
ReplyDeleteI love how you have the pis of a grater too, John better not come within a yard of you!
awesome! lol!
ReplyDeleteAt least with all your selvedge you'll be able to offer him some bandages once the deed is done!!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the best laugh I've had in ages :-)
xxxxx
Way too funny Jodie. Add me to the list, your blog had me fooled at first. I think Moogsmum had a typo shouldn't it have been bondage not bandage him with your selvedges. You could tie him up, then slice off you know what and then with your wonderful sewing skills and only because you are a kind crafty woman who is sew inventive you could stitch it back on again. You could use some creative embroidery, or an invisible thread and as you stitched each stitch you could look him in the eye (so to speak) and tell him what a naughty boy he has been. If you happened to stitch it on backwards you could always undo your stitching and try again....only coz you care.
ReplyDeleteHave a great day you really made me laugh and we all need that.
Oh my- John has visited my blog recently too :(
ReplyDeleteSeems men have too much time on their hands. Maybe they should take up quilting like us :)
everyone else said it all!!
ReplyDeleteall I can say is...so funny "watch out John"
Love your response to John - there are some wired people in blogland - I was getting some strange comments so I took myself off of the blogger register - that has kept them at bay!
ReplyDelete:-)
ReplyDeleteWarm blessings,
Spencer